Paradox

Now that I’m feeling like myself again, it seems like there aren’t enough hours in the day.

So many hobbies, so little time.

I want to read and knit and write and learn. I want to organize my desk and decorate for fall. I want to photograph and craft.

I’m better when I’m busy, but it’s easier being busy when I’m better.

When I was low, the hours felt long and empty. I was lonely, unsatisfied with my own company. I fell into the social media trap of comparing my life with the digital versions of others’ lives.

I tried to get busy, but nothing held my attention long enough or well enough to fill the emptiness.

But I persisted, and slowly, through yoga and meditation and many long walks on the beach, I began to heal. Through words spoken, written, and read, I found my way back to myself.

I once heard that you can’t sit around waiting for motivation to strike, you have to just begin and the motivation will come.

So I got busy, and I found my motivation to get busy again.


Currently reading: Supernatural by Dr Joe Dispenza (almost done!).

Today I’m grateful for crisp fall mornings, the changing colours, and fuzzy warm pjs.

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My Scrapbook of Words

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I love words.

In fact, I love words so much that I collect them.

Every now and then, the kids and I sit down with some old magazines and cut them apart. For them, it is a creative mishmash of random details that become otherworldly creatures. For me, it is a scavenger hunt for juicy words.

These words become a reference for my writing, inspiration for poems, and a teaching tool for lessons (when I was teaching full-time) and my kids (talk about a way to increase vocabulary!).

This book is where I keep them.

The Writing Life

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Sometimes, it is the words on a page that give me pause.

I love to learn from books, to gather ideas from books. At the moment, I am reading Writing Down the Bones by Natalie Goldberg. I am slowly beginning to think of myself as a writer, aiming to have published work. But here is always that tiny inner voice, that is cause for hesitation.

This book makes me believe that I can, that I am.

It is the definition of inspiration.

For This

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I am grateful for this. For having a blog again and waking each morning to writing.

It is helping me to notice the small moments that make me happy. It is something to look forward to. It is also a way to use some of the thousands of photos I have on my hard drive!

But besides that, the writing itself is a gift. To rearrange words, express thoughts, and write a few sentences to share with the world: For this, I am thankful.