mindfulness

The Space of an Hour

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Lately the stress has been creeping back in.

It’s an expensive time of year, with the holidays ahead and the cost of heating through the winter. Gas and groceries keep rising. Snow removal. Grad year expenses for my daughter. There is never enough.

It also seems to be the time of year for appointments. Doctor, dentist, optometrist, therapist. We are running nonstop.

At my teaching job, the kids are getting antsy and the marking is piling up. We are all tired after three pandemic years and the attempt to find some sort of normal again. My patience is thin.

There never seems to be enough hours in the day or dollars in the week.

That old tightness has crept back, the tension hard to shake. I can feel it in my shoulders and my chest, my head still spinning each morning when I wake.

But no matter how buys it gets, I get myself to yoga. It might only be once in a busy week, but I need it like I need water and food and sleep. That one hour sustains me for days, that hour of just breathing, just moving, just being.

That hour reminds me that when everything around me feels out of control, I just need to be in this moment. To just be.

I hope you have something that sustains you, that helps you reset. I hope you have the space of an hour.

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Mindless Mode

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Sometimes all you need… is a little mindlessness. At least, that’s how it turned out for me this week.

I practice mindfulness regularly : I journal, meditate, do yoga, try to eat healthy, and remind myself to be in the moment. I read more than I watch tv, enjoy learning new things, and try to limit my time on social media. I walk my dog often and listen to uplifting music.

This week, that all fell apart.

My daughter experienced what we now think was a severe asthma attack. She’d never been diagnosed with asthma, so when she woke me up on Saturday night because she couldn’t breathe, we didn’t know what was happening.

The last thing I needed was to sit in the moment.

I couldn’t concentrate on my book, couldn’t calm myself through yoga. So I scrolled endlessly on my phone, binge-watched trash tv, and skipped my yoga classes. I didn’t have the energy to cook, or to care about what I ate, so I had chips and cookies and overdosed on dairy. It was cold and windy, so I curled up with blankets and my daughter and my dog and did a whole lot of nothing.

A week later, after multiple appointments and tests, my daughter is doing much better, thankfully. And I am feeling back to myself. It seems a little bit of mindlessness was exactly what I needed.

I hope you find comfort in zoning out once in awhile, that you find some rest in hard moments. And that it all helps you return to yourself.

Into the Light

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I lost myself for awhile.

It’s been four years since I last posted. Four years since I felt like myself.

But here I am, still standing. Standing stronger and lighter and more filled with love and hope than ever.

I didn’t know how much I was in the dark until I climbed back into the light.

I am back.

And I am here to share some of my stories, some of the hard lessons I learned, and how I found myself again.

This is a photography and life blog about finding the magic in the moments, about chasing the light.  

I hope you’ll join me on this journey.

Currently reading: Becoming Supernatural by Dr Joe Dispenza

Three things I am grateful for today: The smell of the rain, the colour of the sky before a storm, and not being in the direct track of Hurricane Fiona.

Mindfulness Challenge Week 26: Stillness

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Life is never truly still.

Slight movements surround us, always.  There are interruptions to our meditations, sounds and distractions.  Breath means movement.

While practicing using my neutral density filter, I left my camera focused on the pool for a few minutes to go help my son clean the car.  I had just tripped the shutter on a 30-second exposure when he called for me.

My daughter, thinking she’d be funny, attempted to capture a selfie on my camera while I was gone.

The stillness of the shot captured her movement in front of the camera, a faint purple haze in front of the pool.

When I was choosing a photo for this entry, my initial thought was to use this first image, as I felt it showed stillness well:

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However, it occurred to me that the challenge of being still is to accept the constant movement surrounding us.  Instead of ruining the image, my daughter inadvertently created a metaphor.

Nothing – not even stillness – is perfect.  I wouldn’t have it any other way.

#createmindfulness2017

Mindfulness Challenge Week 20: Details

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One of the things I love best about photography is that it forces me to pay attention to the details:  the way the light casts shadows; the contrast created by differing backgrounds; or the flowers that have fallen from the plant.

While photographing a brilliant red Canada 150 planter (Happy Canada Day!) on my parents’ back patio, I looked beyond the flowers to the table and spotted these dropped blossoms.  Instantly, I was drawn to the mix of textures and colour created by this composition.  I much prefer it to the photos I made of the flowers themselves.

#createmindfulness2017

Mindfulness Challenge Week 16: Patience

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Testing my Patience

April is the ultimate test of patience:

Shivering in spring jackets, because we can no longer stand to layer ourselves in winter wear; fingers icy because we refuse to wear gloves for even one more day; wiping snow off the car with our sleeves because, frankly, we are fed up.

Watching the snow melt, only to wake up to earth covered – once again – in snow; waiting for the ice to break up in the bay; driving deliberately through puddles so the spray scatters onto snowbanks in the hopes they will melt just a little bit more.

Patience brings rewards, too:

That first glimpse of salty water under the bridge and rivers beginning to flow once more.

An edge of lawn; a blade of green grass.

Sand and waves and a single piece of sea glass.

April can be a cruel month, but the rewards are worth the wait.

 

#createmindfulness2017

Mindfulness Challenge Week 10: Imperfection

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imperfection

Transformation

I’m a little behind on my photo challenge…  Quite apt for this theme:  Imperfection.

This little beach find is perfect for my imperfect theme.  It is slightly cracked, softened by the sea, speckled by the sand, and faded by the sun.  Yet it remains intact, traces of vitality evident in its lines and shape.

Once a vibrant protector of life, it is now vacant.  But the story of life resides in its curves, the scent and sound of the sea still alive within it.

It is imperfect, but it is still beautiful.

 

 

Mindfulness Challenge Week 9: Touch

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The Things We Touch

Every day we put on clothes, we pick things up, we cook, we slide our fingers across our keyboards and our phones – mindlessly.  And yet, in each of these is a touch, a texture, a temperature.  The fabric we wear is stretchy, silky, or soft; the dishes are cool and hard.  Food has endless textures:  bumpy, crumbly, or even slimy.

How often do we notice?

What if we paid as much attention to the water running over our bodies in the shower as we did the pillow we lay our heads down on each night?  What if we were as mindful of the softness of the scarf we wrap around our neck as we are the tag that scratches at our back?

Here is what I do notice:

  • A new book, its pages crisp and clean
  • The warmth from my children when we curl up on the couch
  • The weight and softness of the throw I cover my legs with while I relax
  • The heat of a fresh cup of coffee
  • A pair of fuzzy reading socks
  • A hot bath
  • The almost-spring sun as it heats the inside of the car
  • Ice-cold water during hot yoga (and the grip of my mat during asanas)
  • The smooth keys of the keyboard while I type
  • The curved edges and ridged buttons on my camera

This mindfulness challenge began to help create more awareness in my photography; it is helping to create more awareness in my life.

#createmindfulness2017

Mindfulness Challenge Week 8: Possibility

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Projects

New yarn, craft supplies, patterns…

These are the materials that become the projects that become the process that become the product.

This is possibility.

Possibility is creativity and potential.  It is a motivator and a series of choices.  Possibility is positive thinking, expectation, and hope.  It propels us forward.

Possibility is inspiration.

#createmindfulness2017